Two Shy Guys

Chapters:
Desk Jobs
7th Avenue Stalker
Saturday Morning After
Two-Girl Action
PATH Train Pick-Up

Part 1: Desk Jobs

Characters

Craig: As ever, his sweet adorable self.

Wade: Mid 40s, buff. Gray hair, mature, handsome face, but with a certain je ne c’est quoi that screams “I’m a total bitchy asshole to work for.” Around 5’8” and 200+ lbs. Wearing the latest buff-queen fashions, but not quite qualifying as a fashion victim.

Walter: Taller and slightly less muscular than Wade, around 6’ and 180. Shaved head, goatee. Like Wade, he has that look that says, “I should be an incredibly hot older man, but obviously, I’m a jerk.” Big time fashion victim.

Page 1: Let’s work with a landscape page, three tiers with a tic-tac-toe layout (nine total panels, approximately equal)

Panel 1: 1st tier. Craig chewing a pencil eraser, staring at a blank page

Background Signage: W. O. Media

Cap (lower): Oh, the life of a magazine assistant...

Panel 2: Office clock, b&w, pointing to 2:10 pm.

Cap (upper, slightly different color from the other caps): Friday

Panel 3: Craig sitting at his desk, marking up a manuscript. Closer up.

Craig (to himself): Hmm.... “Deeper, yes. Harder, now!” or “Deeper--yes! Harder... now!”?

Cap: Proofreading...

Panel 4: 2nd tier. Clock at 3:30.

Panel 5: Craig on phone.

Craig: So a quarter page for “Delivery Dudes and Dirty Dads”?

Cap: Ad sales...

Panel 6: Clock pointing to 4:15.

Panel 7: Tier 3. Craig holding two photos in front oh him, contemplating. We shouldn’t see the photos (this is a family strip after all...)

Craig (to himself): Boston Train in the shower or Snoop Sluttz with his finger...

Cap: Page layouts...

Panel 8: Clock pointing to 5:02.

Panel 9: Craig wincing as two voices emerge from off panel.

Wade (off panel): Craig, dear!

Walter (off panel): Craig, darling?

Cap: Editors...

Page 2: Large page, 1 panel.

Panel 1: Craig tries to look pleasant as his bosses (Walter sitting in a chair with his feet on Craig’s desk, Wade perched on a desk corner) grill him.

Wade 1: Proof the porn reviews?

Craig 1: Done.

Walter 1: Fact check the sex club expose?

Craig 2: Of course...

Wade 2: And the centerfold’s photo credits?

Craig 3: In your box.

Walter 2: Tease!

Title: (Black text on white background. Something bold and sans) Desk Jobs

Subtitle:(as above, but smaller) Chapter 1

Page 3: Background panel of Craig forcing a smile as he listens to them. Close up. Two smaller panels arranged across the bottom.


Panel 1: Background panel. The balloons in this panel should look like something that’s being hurled at Craig.

Wade 1 (off): Alright dear, we’re off to Hotlanta at 7:00...

Walter (off): We were supposed to leave at noon, but someone...

Wade 2 (off): Anyway, before we go we wanted to talk to you about that short story you gave us for Thong.

Panel s 2 & 3: Two floats in the lower left corner of the background panel, 3 in the lower right. In 2, Wade talking, waving his right hand as he does so. In 3, Walter talking, holding up hands to show how much he loved the story.Close up. Wade 2 should be lower than the speech balloon in Panel 3, showing it comes later...

Wade 1: Loved the prose.

Walter 1: And such a sweet plot!

Wade 2: But the characters?

Walter 2: Look kid, we gotta talk...

Page 4: Similar to page 3, but Craig looks even more forced, his hand tapping his chin in faux contemplation of what his bosses are saying. The floating panels are to his left.

Panel 1: Background panel.

Panel 2 & 3: As page 3, but both look more serious, more in counselor/boss mode. Two on top of three.

Wade 1: Craig, honey, Thong attracts a certain type of reader.

Wade 1: The kind that can spend their weekends in Miami having up-all-night eight-ways with body builders...

Walter 1: They aren’t going to get hard ons over skinny nerds with glasses.

Walter 2: Or chest hair...

Walter 3: Ew.

Craig (in background panel) 1 (to himself): I quit.

Craig (in bground panel) 2: I’ll redo it for Monday.

Page 5: Three long tiers, staggered. More white space between the second and third tiers.
Panel 1: Tier 1, 2 panels. Wade looking over Craig’s desk (a Craig’s-eye-view, if you will).

Wade: Don’t be absurd, dear, Walter won’t detox from the Tina till Tuesday.

Panel 2: Wade looking over Craig’s desk (again, a Craig’s-eye-view).
Walter: Bitch.

Panel 3: Second tier, a rear view of the terrible two exiting.
Wade 1: If you need us, you have the cells.

Walter 1: Don’t break the fake smile and flip us off till we’re out the door!

Wade 2: Have some fun...

Walter 2: But not too much... Deadline Tuesday!

Panel 4: Long view, upper shot view of Craig reclining in his desk chair, almost parallel to the length of his desk, grabbing his hair in frustration.

Craig (to himself): I need a real job.

Page 6: Three staggered box panels, each with a different scene from Craig’s walk home.

Panel 1: Craig walking through lower Greenwhich Village toward Washington Square, looking a tad frustrated.
Cap 1 (Craig): I could take the subway, but I’m not sure right now what I’d rush home to...

Cap 2: And Greenwhich Village always manages to calm me down...

Panel 2: Craig, having checked his mail, is sorting through it on the way upstairs.
Cap 1: I guess could spend tonight looking for a job.

Cap 2: I’ve been meaning to do that for a while...

Cap 3: But I keep putting it off.

Panel 3: Close up of Craig's hand setting the mail next to Brian's phone number next to the phone and other sundries on the night stand.
Cap 1: Been putting a lot of things off.

Cap 2: Of course, it'd be kinda rough making that call at this point.

Cap 3: "Hi Brian? You dropped your phone number on the ground at F-A-G two months ago and I've finally got the balls to call you..."

Page 7: Background panel has Craig looking into a fridge in the lower left corner, making a face. Two other box panels are diagonal, from left.

Panel 1: Close up of roommate’s note stuck to fridge with a Scooby Doo magnet.
Note: Craig: Went to Philly for the weekend. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do! -- Terry

Cap: Friend’s are out of town...

Panel 2: Craig’s face, extreme close up, as seen in the dimly lit kitchen looking into the fridge.

Cap: And if I stay home, I’ll just spend all night snubbing weirdos in chat rooms.

Craig (to himself): Hmm... What’s in this...

Panel 3: Background panel.

Craig (to himself): Ew... I should go out to eat.

Cap 1: So it looks like another night on the town.

Cap 2: By myself.

Cap 3 (lowest right-hand corner): Don't get too excited.
posted by RR at 6:51 PM